Revising Is Hard

Look, I have some ideas for blog posts... but I don't know how to write them. I know what I want to write about but the words won't transfer from my brain to the computer screen... so instead of figuring out how to write what I want to write about, I'm going to procrastinate by writing this blog post about writer's block. Honestly, its a Sunday, I'm tired, my brain feels kind of fried and I'm not feeling the motivation to write even though... I want to write? I don't know if any other writer has felt this way but sometimes I just get this itch to write. This need to write something, to transfer what I'm feeling right now, all this pent up writerly energy, into a story. But I don't know what story! Because I definitely feel no draw or motivation at all to continue writing revision scenes for Silver... I'm still waiting on Project Hellion beta readers before working on that. I just wrote like four short stories that I have to revise. I don't want to revise. I just want to write and not just a short story. I want to write something original and new and I'm feeling sort of pent up from all this revision and technical thinking and planning.

The truth is, I've been revising a lot. I feel like I've been revising for forever! (Yeah I know, I'm dramatic sometimes). But that's what it feels like and it's kind of getting tiring and old and just... uninspired. I love my Golden and Silver, the world and characters I'm building in those books and I CAN NOT WAIT for the day when I can finally move on from Silver and just write Bronze cuz I would love to write more original content with Renee and Zayde! And I love Project Hellion. I love what I'm doing with that world and characters too. I love that I'm getting to wrap up Delphi's story and that I have stuck with this sequel through thick and thin for the past year. I'm really proud that I did that because I've never stayed on a project that long and felt so determined and driven to finish a book before. Like people that know me well know, I can be kind of impatient. I don't like waiting and with my writing, I don't - or didn't - like sitting and obsessing over a book for years like some writers do. But now I understand why they spend years perfecting a story. Because they're passionate and in love with the characters. I get that now... but right now, I'm feeling like half the reason I'm burnt out on blogging and feeling uninspired and just sort of bleh about the thought of revising Silver, is because I have just been go, go, go on revising. I've been using so much brain energy into revising Silver and Project Hellion and even just thinking about them constantly. Us writers are excellent at obsessing and I think I'm starting to perfect that special talent, for better or worse. I've spent up my writerly energy and now I need to replenish it. I know one of the ways to do that is to consume good stories and trust me, I have been consuming good stories for the past few months. Reading good books, watching good shows. Right now I'm almost done rewatching The Originals, which is top-notch story telling in my opinion. But another way to replenish my writerly energy is to just write something new. To get out of my own head, to take a breather so that when I come back to Silver I can write with motivation and passion and not have my writing completely suck. If you aren't inspired, that your writing won't sound or feel inspired by the readers. That's how I think of it anyways, and that's why I rarely force myself to write when I'm just not feeling it.

So, I'm still going to be working on Silver. I'm determined to get those revisions done by the end April or beginning of May and really, I am so close to being done! So close to being done with this round of revisions, but I just need a small break. Especially if I plan to go straight from Silver to Project Hellion. Revising is great and you should stick with your stories and polish them up for as long as they take, but you also have to write. Write original content, write fan fiction, write short stories or a novella, something to just keep your writing muscles strong and healthy.

And that is why I am writing my Wendigo story. It doesn't really have a name yet, but I'm loving it so far! The two main characters are characters I've never really written before. Tullah is kind and compassionate and a complete empath. She feels deeply for everyone and everything around her and her first instinct is to help and comfort. Dakota (the Wendigo) is quiet, awkward, has a hard time keeping a conversation because he's been a Wendigo for long and doesn't really remember how to talk like a normal person. He has a lot of nervous ticks and is always restless and a little anxious. I've really loved writing it and I don't know how long the story will go for, but for now, I'm just enjoying getting to know Tullah and Dakota.

Anyways... that was a bit of a ramble and something that I just felt the need to write about. I hope I'm not the only writer who has felt this way about revising nonstop for so long. I admire writers who work for years and years on just one book, whether your published or unpublished, it's amazingly impressive that you can do that. Just a few months into working on just the one book nonstop and I feel like I'm going crazy, even if I do enjoy the revision process. This post isn't as long as most of my other posts, but I plan to write a review of Ready Player One for Friday so get ready for that. (Just so you know, I loved it! I didn't read the book, but I did love the movie).

Have a great week everyone!!